This Viral Couple Miscarried. Here’s What We Can Learn From Them | Ann Zamudio

10 Aug

This Viral Couple Miscarried. Here’s What We Can Learn From Them | Ann Zamudio.

this is about announcing you are pregnant and then announcing you have miscarried. the article says usually there is a saying not to announce anything until the 2nd trimester, when the chances of the baby surviving is better.

i wonder if that is why the chinese keep quiet until then. call it superstition, but announcing too early may be tempting fate. the chinese might even feel it is better not to know if u are pregnant during the first trimester. that way, if it miscarriage, the first u will know is the miscarriage itself, and u might not even notice it different from the usual menses, and i myself believe what u dont know wont hurt you, at least in this case. there are times when ignorance is bliss, and i think this is one of them.

the article says nevermind, just announce the baby is due in the first trimester, but i wonder if by not announcing it too early, the mother will ensure she is not too attached to the unborn baby. announcing the baby i think makes the mother start getting to be attached to the unborn baby, so that if a miscarriage occurs, the feelings the mother experiences of acute loss are more severe.

certainly if i were the father for it also applies to the father, not being too attached to the unborn child until you are sure it will go to its full term; or even if i were the mother, i would not announce it too early, so my hopes are not raised too high. perhaps my way of looking at it is a very ‘chinese ‘ way of dealing with life. haha.

in the old days, parents would name their kids after animals, dogs (Ah kow)for sons, pigs(ah chu) for daughters. i know my sister was so named. she is the only girl child in our family , there was another little girl who did not survive infancy; (in fact, when i was a kid, i thought ah chu means sister, haha) there were 5 boys (all of them survived) so no need  to name any one of us boys after dogs, haha.   just in the hope that it will fool the fates not to take the child away, by pretending the child is not so precious.

i think before any western mother says how barbaric, i think it is a kind of reverse psychology, like calling your little one a little monkey, a term of endearment. so it is with calling your sons, a dog, or your little girl a pig, everyone knows that is a child that is specially loved and precious. it is a wonder the fates have not caught on and take every child called a dog or pig. haha. but of course never apply logic to superstitious or old folk tales.

added, 17.8.15 here is another take, in vanity fair, about how creepy this guy is for stealing his wife’s urine, testing it in a pregnancy kit and then telling her about it , all on video. sounds like all this is scripted by the two of them. they say now that she got a miscarriage, but after all that drama, i wonder if that pregnancy kit gave a false reading and she was not pregnant at all. nowadays with all this instant fame when u post anything on the internet, people will be tempted to act up and create drama.

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