just musings

31 Mar

london 6.59pm 15.C dry sunny friday 2017

even though it says 15C, it is not really very warm. highest today was 17.5C. when i went out to sit in the sun earlier on about 2.30pm, it was only a fitful sun, as clouds cast a shadow on it, and there was a strong cold wind. so in only a minute, i was dragging my chair back in again.  haha. ah well, at that time i had just chatted to a guy who messaged me in the gay website about being social nudists. he works nearby and is on his lunch break and wants to meet for a naked social. but it is too cold (to be naked i mean. with clothes it is very comfortable) in my flat and also i have my friend busy in the kitchen cooking up a curry and my friend is not a nudist. i think i realise why i have stopped being one… it is just too cold haha. but maybe this summer will be hot enough to indulge. who knows really.

 i remembered another friend of mine have rooms to let, so i emailed him, and he told me he actually have two rooms to let. so i forwarded that info to this guy in the gaywebsite who first asked me if i know anyone who rent rooms. so now he got another option. one is in crystal palace, the other friend is in hallesden. in terms of ease of transport, hallesden is easier.

 i have been in all day, did not feel like going out. but it was very pleasant to be inside. in the past i would read, because there was no internet and the tv programs are only limited to the 3 channels. unlike now when there are so many channels, but today none worth seeing… so i just was on the internet, reading the news, which was rather boring. and chatting with occasional guys on the gay website.

in fact, found a fellow gay malaysian there. he is 35yrs old . i have not found any gay malaysians in that website before. so it was rather interesting. hope we can meet, once my foot got better, but sometimes these chats go no further. i am curious to meet fellow gay malaysians to find out what their gay experiences are like. esp when they are younger than me and so they would give me a young man’s perspective of being gay in london in this modern times. he tells me he knows of more gay malaysians here. that is another thing too, i have not seen any gay malaysians in that website.

added. that is not saying much, because they are there, except i would not know as none of them will mention their nationality. even this guy when we first got in contact had not much info on his profile. he just wanted a massage buddy. he has been very carefully giving me bits of info of himself. it seems he is in a relationship and says it has to be discrete. there are no photos on his profile so i dont even know what he looks like. 

it would be nice to have a gay club of gay malaysians and their admirers. haha. 

this is rather funny. not on my gay website that i belong to, but it is showing how it is getting so extreme this identification of what a person wants to call themselves

i got this article from my wordpress reader about a tv person talking of who should be allowed to use the woman’s toilet. she herself is a transgender person and she is saying just because u are a man in drag does not mean u can use a woman’s toilet. the whole thing about the transgender issue is throwing up complications like this, and people are getting into a huge twist trying to rationalise who can use what. it makes me realise gone are those simple days when a man is a man, and a woman is a woman… now whatever u say u are , is it. the comments section of that article is illuminating. that part about shaving legs is interesting. 

this whole transgender thing has got gays involved. but really gays should not be involved in it. not all transgender people are gay, or think of themselves as gay. though i sometimes wonder how the mind handles it. does a man who thinks he is straight when he becomes a woman, does he continue to fancy woman? which makes him a lesbian, or does he/s start to date men… as that is what straight women do right… and he(she) considers himself(or herself)(confusing or what!) straight…it got me all in a spin, what am i , really? it makes life difficult, and as i always like my life to be easy, i am never to take that view  of body dysmorphia, and think i am a woman inside a man’s body.



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