Tag Archives: gay

a visit to poole

20 Aug


I have just got back from visitng my friend in poole.
Went on thurs and back today.
Went via megabus.com on a £1 fare , costing £3 return (50p booking fee each way). it may call itself megabus, but it is not the bus i got, but the train. 2hr trip for £1.

The cheapest fare , beating the national express coach fare , and the coach is 3hrs compared to the2hrs by train.

It’s a nice short holiday for me, but it kind of reinforced for me that I like London and staying at my place.

I went for the naked party that my friend was host.

This time he decided to make it start at 3pm instead of earlier and not have food on the table at all. He provided a non alcoholic punch, and made it a bring- a- dish or -snack naked party.

It is a good format, because guys just got on with interacting. He also invited a guy who is very into sex. And so he sat the tone of the party. You do need a few guys who like sex to make it an orgy. Otherwise everyone feels inhibited.

So that was a nice party, at one time I lifted my head from my own sexual doings and saw a foursome that looked like a porn scene. The guys were tanned and looked good naked.

I have come to realise that I don’t like travel just for the sake of travelling, anymore. I know this is a good aim that many travellers like. Just the act of travelling is enough for them, rather than the destination. A bit like Life really.

But I think it is enough for me to be travelling via my Life, rather than physically travelling from one place to another.

That is why even though I enjoyed my visit to poole, I doubt I shall do it often.
Part of it is because I don’t seem to want to sightsee anymore. In the past I travelled because I wanted to see new sights. And there is a lot of new sights to see all over the world.

Now, I wonder if there are any amongst you who also had enough of travelling just to sight see. I think most travellers graduate from being merely sightseers to just wanting a change of scenery and people so they can adopt a new persona. So the purpose of their travel to another place is so they can change their persona. Try on a new one, as a manner of speaking as everyone they meet will be a stranger and wont know their old persona.

Or they can just be a sex tourist. Haha. Like me when I went to poole. (i think to many people sex tourism implies paying for sex. but it is not always necessary to pay for it, esp if u are gay).

Though I did manage to buy something from the charity shops. Not so many good bargains as long ago, but still, poole is the only place I know where u can get items for 10p. like this pyrex bowl. The knifes i use to spread jam, etc. their flat shape lends itself nicely to that. as well as they cut meat very well too. in the past i use to buy one for 10p each. 


life in london now

30 Jun


Come summer, the tv programs are full of repeats so I am able to spend less time watching tv, and reading more. Just as well, as I got a lot of books to read.

You might ask how come I spend so much time indoors, (which u can suspect is what I do if I say I read a lot) when it is so nice outside now.

Most of us read indoors, rather than outside. Partly because the sun is really fierce if it is shining and reflects the page too glaringly bright to make reading comfortable. And if it is not shining it may mean a shower or two, or a chilly wind makes it equally uncomfortable to read outdoors.

Anyway, I spend a lot of time indoors as now with the pollen in the air, I find it gives me hay fever.

Late evening I find is the worst time to go out. For some reason, the pollen is heavier. Sometimes I would like to wear those cartoon images of a goldfish bowl over the head, where I can have my own air system and so avoid breathing air outside.

Or more practical, I sometimes feel the temptation to go out wearing swimming goggles, just to keep my eyes away from all those bits of grit flying in the air. I wonder whether those people we see wearing wrapa round sunglasses are those who want to protect their eyes from grit and not just wannabee tv celebrities. haha. 

Someone should invent some kind of head gear that covers the head , is transparent and have a fine filter that will sieve out the pollen for us hay fever sufferers. Also for those affected by polluted air, like those in s.e.asia with the haze from the smoke fires in Indonesia, I am sure they would love to have something that they can cover their head, with a fine filter so allow them to breathe pollution free air.

I think there may well come a time when we shall all be walking outdoors with a transparent mask that covers our eyes and noses, and a tube leading to a air supply.

I want to recommend a book which I finished recently. It is ‘jack glass’, by adam Roberts.

It is the first time I discovered this author, and he is a real good one. His descriptions are really something. And this is not even saying how good his plots are. So much so that i went to the library and borrowed another book of his, ‘Polystom’. 

I was browsing my wordpress reader, and saw a blog by Sophie pitman

about the heat in new york now. New york is almost the same latitude as uk, but the extremes of temperature it experience is nothing like here.

Which makes me more convinced than ever that here in London, we really have ideal weather.

It is now 21C in my flat, according to this nhs thermometer that my friends gave me. Yet it is wonderfully cooler outside due to a combination of lower temperature and wind. it is ideal.

Yesterday was the london gay pride and we had wonderfully sunny day for it. there were lots of people wandering around. I did not enter the trafalgar square area, which has high billboards surrounding it, hiding the acts in there. I wonder why they do that? It means people outside the area cannot see the acts. But i think it was no great problem for us gay guys, because i think like me they all must have decided that area is too straight for our liking. I know, you will say dont be silly, how can there be any straight people around, but what i meant is that it is too straitlaced. haha.

Those of us in the know move to soho instead, where the real gay thing is going on. Lots of gay men galore. I was observing the crowd and noticed there don’t seem to be much cruising going on. nobody catches anothers’ eye and start a conversation with them. i wonder why?

The only time i saw an interaction with strangers was a young guy who stopped dead in his tracks to stare at a young woman who was sitting in a table near where i was sitting, outside a cafe at shaftsbury avenue. he was with a bunch of guys , they were heading towards soho from chinatown; but he veered off from them and approached her and tried to get her attention, but she was not having it. ignored him totally, and he had to sheepishly go away. i thought was he trying to pick her up? but surely he knows that today of all days, anyone here will be gay… and she is most probably a lesbian.

Maybe I have been out of the cruising game for so long i have forgotten what the etiquette is now. haha. I thought gay pride is a chance for all of us to meet other gay guys and cop off with them. haha. but i think that is wishful thinking now. In the past, we all go off to a park , brockwell park near brixton comes to mind,(to my mind that was the golden age) and there we can cope off with like minded guys all we want haha. Now, we dont end up in parks anymore, but in soho. 

added 2.6.14 i just now reread this, and realised why there was no visual cruising going on in soho at pride… everyone is doing it via grindr. no wonder so many were looking down at their phone.

i found a pack of smoked mackerel in my laundry basket

18 Jun

I just now found a tightly wrapped in plastic smoked mackerel, about 4 of them with some kind of filling in them.
They smelt ok so I put it in the fridge. I thought it was simon’s and that he had taken it from the freezer to thaw. Though why he would put it in the laundry basket is quite beyond me, but I am used to him putting things in strange places.

When I asked him, later, he said it was not his. and he said better throw it away. what a shame, but if it is not his, than it must be one of my guests and they had left 1week ago. so that fish has been sitting there in this warm weather all that time. it is a wonder it is not smelly. i hate throwing away food, but i am not too keen on smoked mackerel so i threw it away into our communal bin rather than into my waste bin. 

I wonder whose it can be?

I know, u must be thinking what a strange household where it is so chaotic( think messy that is what u are really going to say but are thinking not to say so because that is not tactful, admit it haha) in the kitchen that this guy don’t know what is what.

I admit my kitchen is messy but I have a good excuse for not knowing what is in my laundry basket. Haha.

Our old washing machine had packed up quite some time ago, and we had not done any washing , in fact, ever since our guests left. That is about a week ago.

Anyway, I think one of them left it there. And he did not say anything because he thinks one of us ate them when he could not find it anywhere.

Today our new washing machine came that is why I had been catching up on my laundry and for the first time need to use the laundry basket.

(simon bought it online from argos,its a Bush 127QW, £210 plus £15 to pay for them to take away the old one. they are really good with the delivery, said they will be here at 10am and arrived promptly on time). 

I am glad that we got all the parts to connect the new washing machine to the mains water.

I found we don’t have the hose for the inlet pipe. I thought we have lost the water inlet hose. And was kicking myself for not making sure I took the old one from the old machine before letting the delivery men take it away.
I wrote a note to simon, he was sleeping, to tell him about it.

To calm myself I decided to go out. And not wanting to get back to the flat, and unable to settle down in the library to read the papers, I decided to take the bus to john lewis in oxford st to get a free cup of coffee. I thought I shall treat myself to it and get away from the flat to forget about it.

Anyway, john lewis was so busy, it was lunchtime, there was a long queue for the service tills, so I decided to go to the Tottenham court branch instead. They are really very good about it, making no fuss about my getting free coffee. When I showed the coffee and my Waitrose card to the cashier, the cashier just ask what coffee I took. This time I took café latte, which was much nicer than the capuccino last time.

It was really a pleasant experience, I took my coffee to Bedford square and drank it there, ate it with some biscuits I bought at the sainsburys in Pimlico and read the metro newspaper which I found on the bus.

I then took a walk to soho, looking at the shops and just people watch, passing a thai restaurant full of customers with more sitting outside next door to another with no one inside… passed by the C&R restaurant in Rupert court, the one with the laksa, and saw the laksa is £7.50, not £6.50 in their website.

When I got back, having got myself in perspective…, so what if the part is missing, it is minor really… simon had fixed the washing machine and it was on. He said the parts were all inside the washing drum. So that was a nice relief, and kind of showed me there is really nothing to get dramatic about. Just leave it be and it will all right itself.

It’s a warm day today and it was pleasant to be wandering around London. There were a lot of people in the charlotte st area eating in the restaurants. I was thinking the economy must be allright surely, if all these people can afford to eat in restaurants for their lunch. But maybe charlotte st is full of media and PR types, because along Tottenham court road where there used to be lots of computer shops, there were quite a number of empty shop fronts.

Went to old Compton st and into a gay shop to get the free boyz magazine and saw another …fs magazine free too and took that too. ( no qx, another freebie gay magazine, am I too early for it to come out, or too late and it had all been taken?…I think too late, because it comes out on Thursdays and today is Tuesday. I think qx is more popular for eg it lists my favourite sex club but boyz do not list it.)and saw a batch of ‘Time out’ magazines placed alongside these free ones. There was no price listed on it. So I took one and ask the cashier is Timeout free ? He said yes.

That surprised me , when had it become a free magazine??…

Just goes to show how long it has been that I took a wander in old Compton st and browse in their sex shops.

Another surprise, I was on old Compton st, and I saw flags flying outside a shop saying clone zone. It has moved from its old place across the street. One of the shop assistants was standing at the doorway, and I asked him and he confirmed it.

One thing I should say to all shop assistants , don’t stand in the doorway. It discourages customers from entering the shop.

They are preparing for the big profitable day at pride on Saturday 29june.
That is another weekend to look forward to for us gay guys.

ramblings in both sense of the word

13 May

I would imagine most people develop a routine and get a lot of comfort from it. I think that is why for those who work, we wear a uniform…those men who have to , wear suits and of the same colour everyday, because it means getting dressed everyday is not always filled with decisions what to wear. We men are practical, unlike women who still want to make that decision first thing in the morning everyday.

When I was working I wore a uniform too. And so I can wear anything on the way to work. But I remember I wore a shirt and tie just to look smart.

My life now is filled with routine and I like it. People might say that is a dull life, but it is surprising how comforting it is. I like it because it means I don’t have to make decisions everyday on these mundane details. Too much choice can be tiring.

So my breakfast is the same everyday. Oats, with sultanas, or if I got fresh fruits lying around and getting a bit old, (usually simon’s fruit as he tends to forget to eat them). When fruits are really fresh, I like to just eat them without anything accompanying them. There is nothing like crunching into a fresh juicy apple. I seem to like gala apples nowadays as they are sweet and crunchy.

Sometimes if I feel like it I will get frozen slices of bread and toast them. And eat them with apricot jam, or peanut butter.

Routine is a good thing in my view.

But yesterday I decided to change my routine and go walking with a gay group in Essex. That is way out east of London.

I left my place and got the 8.31am tube from Pimlico, my nearest tube station, to Walthamstow, the end of the victoria line. And was intending to catch the bus to woodford, but passed a bus stop where there were a group of tube people waiting for the replacement bus service to Snaresbrook, and it came very soon, so I boarded that and it was free.

A good trip, as it did not stop anyway and went straight to Snaresbrook, and quite a short journey too. Never realise these two stations are so close to each other.
One tip, if u live in that area u could just ride on that bus and not pay anything. They never ask to see your tube ticket, and anyway we all have oyster cards and without a machine they cannot read it anyway. I guess it is some kind of compensation for the inconvenience of having the whole line closed from Liverpool st station to Leytonstone.

So anytime u see a replacement bus service u can just hop on board and not pay.

But if u consider that Sunday the shops are closed, there is no reason to go to these places anyway. Yes, in these outskirts of suburban London, shops still close for Sunday. Mind you even central London can be quiet on a Sunday.

When u consider London is a world city, it seems strange that even the centre of London has a sleepy air about it on a Sunday.

In the past, gay guys would plonk themselves down in a coffee shop in old Compton st in soho; and watch fellow gay guys cruising the streets; but that is long gone I think. Old Compton st has long ago lost its title as the gayest street in London. Or maybe I am wrong. Just because I don’t do it anymore, does not mean others have stopped.

And after catching the tube to woodford and changing to the Hainault line, I finally arrived at about 9.50am way too early for the 10.30am meeting time. But better to be early than late.

The walk itself is rather ordinary… our leader lost his way several times, and have to retrace his steps which is not much fun for us. Still we are there to walk, so it does not really matter .

We walked through Hainault forest but there were not many blue bells to be seen.

And those I saw were the Spanish variety which is not so nice as the british ones. The british ones are so fine and small, that if u see them in a glade, it looks as if there is a fine blue mist floating over the ground. It is a very ethereal effect.

Walking through Hainault forest made me realise that if u have seen one forest you have seen them all. Haha. And the shade makes for a cool walk,as the sun cannot get through, even though the leaves are only in bud. The upside is the trees protected from the wind.

Later we entered an area like a field, full of grass and the wind was fierce. It was a cloudy time then, so we did not even have the pleasure of the sun’s heat. We saw canary wharf in the horizon.

The fields were still having young wheat plants. The season was late because of the cold spring. The young wheat look like grass. The upside is that there is no pollen yet. It made me realise that I better not take these country walks later in the year as it would aggravate my hay fever.
Sometimes, I forget about these things, and then land myself in the middle of a ripening wheat field busy throwing up tons of pollen into the air. And wish I were not there.

I have a feeling that when people get into trouble, that is when they realise why they should not have done it.

Climbing mountains for eg. It sounds such a nice idea, what will be better when u set out on a nice sunny morning… it is later when it all turns dark and cold and stormy that u begin to realise u made a mistake. Some people paid for that mistake with their lives.

But luckily none of that applies to our walk in the countryside that Sunday. It was a pleasant way to while away the time. We saw two other people using the paths the whole time we were there. U can take that as crowded or sparse. I have been in other walks where we never see anyone.though those were naked walks and taken during the weekdays.

Some of the guys travel a long way. One from Farnborough another from brighton both by car. One from Alexandra palace in south London,(correction. it is in north london. i may live in london for many years but i dont know where it is).  another from ealing broadway, west London by tube. He went to the stop just before Walthamstow and took the overground train to Leytonstone.

Another came from Vauxhall, which is the next stop to mine, but he went to Liverpool st and took the overground train to Ilford, and then the bus back to our meeting point. . He said he started at 7.30am and just arrived at about 10am.

Even with the disruption of tube service, there were about 10 of us.

On my return trip, I was lucky to catch the connections very quickly one after the other, without any long waits.

In all these activities, the main aim of us participants is to meet other gay guys or so I guessed. One of the guys told me he joined in hoping to meet young guys his age. He looked like he is in his late 20s or early 30s. But most of the walkers were in their late 40s upwards.
So he was a bit disappointed. He is Italian looking and so was his friend of about his age.

Well, no one can promise that the age group will be predominantly 20s or 30s. In fact I think if you want that age group u would be better off going to clubs. I know when I was that age group I liked going to clubs.

I think it rather restricting on yourself to specify just a limited age range but then that is my view. Others might find they have more in common with people their age group.

By wanting to meet others, I don’t know if he meant for sex or just social. Probably for both. Haha.

some memorable posts in wordpress (to me anyway)

20 Mar

I woke up this morning with 3 posts in wordpress blogs running around in my head. They are exceptionally vivid.

So I thought I shall collect them together in this post.

A very frank account of the conversation between two guys who have broken up and the offender wanting to get back again.

A personal account of a young chap who seem to have come to terms with himself. Good for him.

Asking why gay people want to follow religion (it refers to islam, but I think it can apply to any religion I think, not only the muslim one) that don’t want them. I can only wonder at it.
Perhaps it is the same impulse that makes someone want to join a club that do not want them.
Or is it a perverse desire to join in so that u can change their culture. If enough gays join the church maybe it might make it change its stance on gays. Who knows.
It is like a woman insisting on joining a men only club, so that she can change their rules.

Or how about it is some people wanting to conform. It reminds me of a small kid wanting to join the big kids in their games and not being allowed to do so.
Well, don’t take all the above reasons too personally. It is just me putting in what I think might motivate people to join places (straight women wanting to join gay places or go to gay clubs); or institutions(marriage, kids) or straight society where it is clear that they don’t want you.

Last night I saw a re run of I, Claudius, a bbc series based on robert graves book of the same name.

It is on bbc4 and I saw it at 10pm on Tuesday. There are 13 episodes. Most probably it continues every Tuesday.

I saw this tv program ages ago, when I first came to the uk, and thought it marvellous. it made me read the book. The book is much better, but if u have not read the book u will find this adaptation fascinating. A lesson on how to adapt a classic without a lot of money and making it fast paced and contemporary without resorting to fancy costumes and archaic use of words. In fact a lesson on making a soap opera out of classic material.

Seeing it again, I am struck at how much I have forgotten. And I can see the limitations of money forced them to resort to talking heads. (I don’t remember that but now of course we are so used to action and fabulous props and clothing, it is obvious ).

But the acting is marvellous and the script very good, conveying the essence of the book without getting too bogged down with the details.

The book gives the details, so I would suggest u go back to the books for a more satisfying read.

But this visual representation of the book is a good effort. The series continues and I shall follow it to recapture a bit of nostalgia.


i rediscovered the wheel.

13 Feb


I was watching a tv program last night, death in paradise, about murders in a Caribbean island. I watch it for the sunshine and coconut trees and tropical vegetation, it feels nice to see a place full of sun .

The plot is a old one, two men meeting as strangers and plotting to kill each other’s wives. There is a film of it, called strangers on a train.

But what I remember is one of the characters, a woman who said she went to a spa, supposedly it was a treat. And later they discovered she did not go there.

When asked why, she said it occurred to her how silly for her to go to a sauna in a hot climate. So instead she went to a bar to try to pick up men.
Of course a spa is not only a sauna, there are massages and aroma therapy and god knows what else. But I think most of us would equate a spa with a sauna, steam room, Jacuzzi, all having one thing in common. They are hot.

Later, it did occur to me that what she said is true. Why do tropical countries have saunas, and why do people go there, when just by going outside they will have a full fledge hot sauna, sweat and all for free.

Yet, every hot country I have been have saunas as businesses. They would have cold airconditioned rooms , so that u have the anomaly of frigidly cold rooms and hot saunas. Whilst the outside is hot and humid naturally.

I get the feeling there is something I don’t know, the knowing of which will explain why sauna businesses exist in such hot countries.

I can understand why there are gay saunas, because they are perfect places for gay guys to cruise and have sex.

But u cannot tell me that all those sauna businesses are covers for gay activities.

Oh hang on, straight saunas are covers for prostitution. Female prostitutes use them. Now I get it.

I guess all reading this will be shaking their heads in disbelief. What is with this guy, are there such innocents around still? He is giving adults a bad name. haha. Everyone knows saunas are euphemisms for sex parlours.

Like I said, I am the guy who discovers the wheel and runs around telling everyone of it!! To find that everyone knows it already.




12 Feb

Sunday 10.2.13
I had thought to post some pics of the Chinese new year celebrations in London round Trafalgar square and Chinatown. But it rained practically throughout the time allotted for it, a small drizzling rain.

I don’t mind the rain, as I was able to use my rain coat, but it cannot be very nice for those who want to celebrate it outdoors. And it cannot be much fun for those providing the entertainment or food stalls or souvenir stalls. And the day was too dull to make happy pictures. Haha.

But London is such a large city and have so many people I am sure even if a small number of those people who came there are young enough to enjoy the day and bring their boisterous nature to it, it will be enough to lighten the spirit for everyone else.

So if my friend and I don’t stay long, (my friend suggested we move on to the south bank); it does not mean the day was a washout.

We are too old to hang around. One of the things about being old, or older is that u really come to realise that new year celebrations are really for the young. They get to receive ang pows, and new clothes, and lots of food to eat… and they will be indulged in, with parents who are normally very strict the rest of the year, relaxing and giving tacit permission to play the fool a bit.
Not that my parents were strict, but I know my parents are unusual in this respect. A lot of my Chinese friends have very controlling parents.


I met up with a German friend of long ago who moved to panama to live with his Mexican boyfriend, and works for a hotel chain, and travels half the year abroad a lot for his work. He seldom come to uk, but this time he did and so we met after many years.

It is actually rather a sad and nostalgic meet. Because both of us have grown old… and all our friends have gone. Not gone away from London, but we lost touch with them even though they are living in London. So that there was only two of us to meet. We remember the younger us and those days of frolic in London, unlike now when we all have our separate lives and cannot even muster a big reunion of all our old friends.

Reunions are not always a happy affair, and can be more of a chore. I know we Chinese always rapsodise the family get together reunion at Chinese new year, but I know it can be rather a bore . Like taking a holiday to the same place every year. And with added horribleness in having to socialise with those in the family if you cannot get along with them in the first place.

I get along well with my brothers and sister, but I am glad I don’t have to go back to Malaysia for a reunion.

That is the reality of life. We grow old. Friends come and go. And we change too, and as we go older, our outlook does tend to concentrate too much on musings on health a lot more than when we were young.

I don’t recall we talked of our health that much when we were young.

And the interesting thing I noticed with our conversation, is that instead of curiosity to hear what the other’s sexual adventures are , we tend to talk of our own adventures and for me anyway, comparing theirs with mine and realising that I don’t really fancy their adventures.

So different from when we were younger, when we have not done things and are not experienced in sex. And when we hear of some unusual sexual practices we are just agog to hear more, even though secretly thinking how awful, I don’t like that.

Not realising that many years later , we will be doing it, liking it and doing it a lot now.

My friend says he goes to saunas a lot during his trips abroad on business . He works for a hotel chain which have many branches worldwide.

And I remember thinking when he said it that I don’t like to go to saunas anymore. Haha. At least not in London. I daresay if I were to be on holiday in Europe, or s.e.asia. I will go because most of the gay action is in those places. And it is a way to meet other gay guys for sex without a lot of complications or danger.

Everyone who likes saunas always say they like how clean they can be and how everyone else is clean too. My friend is no exception. He too praised the cleanliness.

So much emphasis on cleanliness… I guess they have not yet experienced the joy and sexual excitement of guys’ natural scent.

Some guys give off really exciting natural body scents.

It was too rainy to hang around outdoors or to watch the Chinese new year shows… and he was not that interested in them anyway, seeing most of the time u are looking over people’s heads, which is bad enough but this time there are the umbrellas to contend with as well.

So we walked across the river and after going into the festival hall and a number of others places to find a place to sit so we could chat, and finding them so crowded with people there was no room to sit, we finally settled on benches outside the film institute. I think not many sit there because the coffee is very expensive. Or maybe it was a cold day for them. The staff very kindly turned up the open flame heaters without us asking.

It was nice to catch up with him. And to have a glimpse of another life lived differently from mine. He told of his dreams to retire. Though interestingly enough his idea of retirement is to find another job , and set up a B&B in panama!!

I think he was just musing and testing out the possiblities, as he said he wants to buy a place elsewhere, in florida he said for the weather, and move between panama and that place. And of course that is not compatible with running a bed and breakfast in panama. Haha.

There are hurricanes in florida, and the summers are very hot. But I did not remind him of it. After all, we all like to dream and why not!

In fact, even now in panama, he tells me they have bought a place in the mountains near the panama city where they live, just so they can go there over the weekend, to escape the heat. So even though he likes the hot weather, I can see it can be too much sometimes, if not all the time.haha.

I know how it is like. I am from Malaysia, and the weather he said is rather similar in panama. Hot all the time, and either wet during the winter, or dry during the summer months. In Malaysia it is the other way round.

Makes u wonder why they live there when they cannot stand the tropical heat. It seems temperatures in panama is like Singapore. my friend’s reason may be to be with his boyfriend, so that might explain why he lives in panama now. And also explains why he likes going to the highlands. it is very similar to the british when they governed in malaysia, going up to cameron highlands or fraser’s hill , near kuala lumpur to escape the lowland heat. They do it in india too. 

People I find are very contradictory. And they say these contradictory things in the same breath and don’t seem to be aware of it. Haha. I don’t mind, I am very indulgent when I hear guys talking to me about their visions of their future and what they would like their life to be .

I made the observation that in terms of ideal climate, London is the best. Neither too extreme in heat or cold and so pleasant to live in all year round. I know not many will agree with me. Haha. But to those of us who have travelled the world and seen it all, I can assure u London weather is the ideal.

I like the rain. Because it is a nice contrast to dry days. I would be bored if the weather is sunny and dry all year round. It is too much the same. And today’s rain is rather pleasant, a small drizzle with not much wind.

But ‘say that to the marines‘, I hear your collective shout from you all who are currently living under these rain darkened clouds. Haha.






more inane ramblings

31 Jan


The tube closes at about 12.40am now… and that is rather early for a big city that purports to be trendy and vibrant.

Clubbers will have to go back by bus, or taxi, which does not sound great if u are a tourist to London.

I think if I were to be clubbing I too would be rather miffed at not being able to take the tube. It is quicker to get back on the tube than on the bus which stops so often.

When I was younger, I drove into London for a night gay clubbing, and I could do that because traffic was so much less than now. Now I think of it those were really great days, where it was a pleasure to drive into London, easy to park, free too, and I can just hop into the car after the club and drive back . I don’t drink so I could drive back.

But now … if those who drive are telling the truth, it is murder to drive into London for a night out.

So if they succeed in getting a deal with the unions about closing the tube 1 hr later it would be lovely.

It wont affect me of course as I live in the centre of London but also I don’t go late clubbing anymore.

It is one of the paradoxes of life, where when I was younger, I live in the suburbs of London and have to drive in to go clubbing, and don’t mind doing it.
Whereas now I am older, and not interested in clubbing, and just when I live right in the centre and can walk to all the gay clubs, I could not be bothered.

The times have moved on also. Before, gay life centred round gay clubs and pubs before the internet made it so easy to meet guys now.


But bear in mind that I am a minority in not liking clubbing.

I think when you are young, clubbing is an important way of interacting with others and with friends. And you will build up friends in the clubs if u club often enough. The buzz of being in a big club, dancing among so many, with lots of others all enjoying themselves is tremendous and being young u have the energy to stay up late.

And if u like to drink,or take drugs it is more fun doing it with others.

And you now have the drug taking to enhance the experience. I mean not only alcohol , but the others like ecstasy, meth crystal etc. I am no expert in those other drugs, or even alcohol, haha. Just getting what I know from reading blogs about it and talking to friends who have taken these things.

Sarah who commented on my blog says she finds it funny that I jump from topic to topic without any rhyme or reason. I am glad she is not put off by it.

This blog is a random and meandering blog of my thoughts and doings. Hope it provides inadvertent amusement, even if it shows me in a poor light, and people find it amusing to see me blundering around re inventing the wheel, as when I find something that everyone knows for ages, and which I have just discovered and getting so excited about it. Haha.

I am sure readers will be indulgent and just be amused at it, and realise that we all get excited when we find something, whether it is shoes, or beanies, or ideas or insights, and want to tell everyone to find they all know it already. Haha.

For eg, a friend recently told me that volunteering is not all it seems. He tells me that many organisations are using it as an excuse to lay off their paid workers, and replacing them with unpaid volunteers.

And these organisations don’t pay their workers all that much either and because they are short staffed, they impose on their workers. Asking them to come in on their days off because there is no one to do it. And not pay overtime either.
I have a friend who told me he had this friend who works for an old folks home, and is constantly phoned on his day off to work because they are short staffed. And he don’t get paid overtime either.

Maybe everyone knows this. Haha. But it is only now that I became aware of it.

Things are never black or white , are they? Here u are thinking u are doing good by volunteering and u find that u may have put someone out of a job, granted it is a low paid job and maybe u might be doing a favour to that person in that they might be forced to go find another job which pays better, but that is unlikely to be the case for most of these laid off workers.

It is a paradox of life that people want to work in jobs that don’t pay them enough to live on. U would think if the job does not pay enough for you to live on, you will refuse to work there and get a job that pays u enough. But that is not the case. Instead u work in 2 or 3 low paying jobs.

I see all the supermarkets are reducing their check out staff and adding more self help machines, so that source of jobs is going to go. I think it a real cushy job being a check out person. U don’t even need to think, just swipe the goods and the machine will even tell u want change to give back. Haha. But that kind of job is going to go.

People in new york have 2 or 3 jobs. At least that was what I found out when I used to go there regularly(in the late 90s) for Christmas shopping long ago. I met a guy there who told me that was what he does to make ends meet, because each job pays so little. Now I know u must not generalise from just one encounter but I figured that these people with 2-3jobs cannot be so rare that I can meet one of them in my visit to new york. Right? So it must be common to have 2-3 jobs.

If that is the case so long ago, I think it must be more so nowadays in new york. Is it so in London do u think? I have not met anyone who works in 2 or 3 jobs in london. And this is living here for more than 20yrs. So maybe it is not so dire in uk , because there is the safety net of social benefits unlike in usa. Or maybe more likely, I have not heard from these people because people here don’t talk about it.









more found things- beanies

26 Jan


25.12.13 friday
I have been finding beanies and woolly hats in the street these few days.
I think because I was in north London.
There seem to be more people dropping their beanies there than in south London, at least the waterloo area, which is that part of south London that I frequent rather a lot as it is near my gym.

As usual, it is a generalisation, and though people always say never generalise it is still something we humans do. There is some grain of truth in all generalisations. I guess north London is more populous so there are so many more people to drop things. But I found two beanies in the same street.

What was I doing in north west london area on a Friday afternoon?. I went there to have a sex session with a friend in his house.

It was on his street that I found the two beanies. ( I have discovered that is what they are called. Why are they called beanies? I have no idea. Maybe an american (it sounds american) company makes them and so the name became generic, like hoover.

And going there I found a metro newspaper , which is given away free in the morning. There I saw an advert by co op supermarket giving chicken at £1.84 a kg.

So after our sex session, I stop off at oxford st tube, and walked to the co op in brewer st. and bought the chicken. And then took the bus back without much waiting for it and which drop me right by my place.

It is not often we get chicken at this price. My 1.6kg chicken cost about £3.
Ever since they stop battery chickens and imposed more stringent conditions, we have no more £2.50 chickens which is rather a pity. But this price is still a good bargain.

I roasted it and quite delicious too, more so because I haven’t eaten chicken for some time. I have been eating pork since I was able to get it reduced price at the supermarkets. The promotion is on till end of this weekend, and I hope there is still some more chicken left on Sunday for me to buy another one. I just remembered a friend from Bournemouth , the same one who visited me a few weeks ago, is making another visit to me next week. He might enjoy the chicken.

There is a special joy in eating chicken when u had not eaten it for some time. You forget how delicious it can be and eating it now reminds me of it. Such is the easy way I get my joy. Coupled that with the free beanies I pick up on the street; I ask you how can I not be happy?

I was chatting with a guy who first contacted me via a gay website for naked meets that was set up by my friend. He wanted to chat on the phone rather than communicate via email.

Last time I called him , I got his answer machine and when he called me he got my answer machine and so back and forth. I told him that is why I don’t make calls, preferring emails, but he said he much prefer calls, as he can get to know a person very quickly by talking to them.

I said I get all these free calls on my landline but never have much chance of using it as my friends don’t really like to chat for a long time on the phone.

I can understand why too, as calls invariably come when u are sitting down to watch a favourite tv program. Or u got something to do .

And then u run out of things to talk about. He said oh no, not if u are intelligent and have an interest in the world, but I think he may be wrong there. But maybe anyone reading this can correct me.

I said it usually turn to gossip, and that can be rather a waste of time. He said he loves gossip. So there is straight away, a difference between us. Haha.

He said he does not only talk of gossip, but of world affairs and world economics too. Rather surprising to hear that, as it is a dry topic , economics.

I said don’t u find that because there is no solution to the economic crisis, talk on it tends to go round and round? He said that is the fun of it. Well, that is the difference between us then. I don’t find it much fun to talk round and round on something. Waste of time really. But maybe others disagree.

Also, I don’t think it that awful that there is no growth and we go into a triple dip. So what ? Maybe that is an ignorant talking, maybe if there is someone out there who knows about economics they can tell me why it is such a bad think that there is no growth. Why is it a good thing to have growth all the time? It only encourages govts to spend… because growth means the govt get increasing income from taxes etc.

added.26.1.13 the market dont seem to mind. it  is above 6.200 , the highest its been since 2008. it took 5yrs but the market seems to have regain all the losses since 2008. so people may have forgotten that even if there is a recession,measured as minus growth for 3 consecutive quarters,  it is a technical one. the base activity is still the same as 2008 before the recession hit. 

It is the govt’s problem if it’s tax take is reduced. It might make it live within its means. In that they have to lay off more civil servants and employ less people and have less spending. That is a good thing as far as I am concerned.

The news came out that employment rose during this time, a time of supposedly low or negative growth, so where goes the theory that low or negative growth means less employment?

My friend say there will be worst to come, and that 5yrs from now, we shall look back and consider we had a good time now. He cites as an example that we shall have less restaurants and such because the recession would have killed a lot of businesses.

I said maybe the restaurants will stop raising their prices so much and get down to more basic cooking and stop using expensive meats and jacking up the prices with unnecessary expensive garnishes and ingredients. And be forced to reduce their prices. That would be a good thing from a customer’s point of view.

But of course all this may be a lot of hot air, and I am talking rubbish. Haha. I don’t know how economics works and don’t really want to know. I don’t run the country, thank goodness. Haha.

I think that if the prices in restaurants become too much for people, because they are not earning enough, and the economy is not booming, making people less carefree about spending, it will force restaurants to keep their prices down and source cheaper cuts of meat while making it appetising.

That is a good thing , cut prices across the board.

I am sure there is a flaw somewhere to this line of reasoning.Image

But don’t write in to tell me. I don’t care.

23 Jan

i wonder whether the girls are also at it, rent a girlfriend for a boy to bring home to meet the parents. it is all good commerce haha.

Seeing there are more boys than girls i would think the girl- for -hire scenario is more likely.

i wonder if there are many gays in china who have to hide their sexuality from the parents and so have to hire someone to bring home to parents for the cny reunion.

some of them marry lesbians or straight women to hide their sexuality from the parents.

and it is a puzzle to me why the girls find it hard to find a boy to marry. one would have thought with so few girls around, they would have their pick of boys. but i guess money is important . No girl want to marry a poor boy.

I have a thought . Since parents just want grandchildren, why dont the gays marry a surrogate mother and get a child? that way they can fulfill the desire of their parents for a son, whilst being free to live their gay livestyle without any nagging from the parents.

I guess it wont happen it is too simple a solution. added. not only a simple solution, it is a very expensive one. haha. the surrogate mother is not going to do it for a pittance, that is for sure. so this solution is only available for rich people, and even then it is a partial solution, as no rich person will want to marry the surrogate mother, and the parents will not be willing to accept a bastard child.

So it looks like i have discovered why this solution  is not going to be simple or popular. ah well, back to the drawing board. haha.

I am just glad i dont have that problem. it just goes to show if they just be honest and tell their parents about their being gay it would make life so much easier for them. it wont make life easy for their parents as their hopes for a son is dashed forever, but u cant tell, they might be willing to accept a surrogate birth, if the son uses his own sperm. of course, it might be a daughter and that is another kettle of fish to contend with, seeing daughters are not popular amongst the chinese parents.

Ah we humans, we do like to make life complicated dont we?

Death Noodle

snakeSince China’s gradual opening up to the world post-Mao, a whole generation of youngsters have grown up free from the life or death choices that faced their forebears. These Little Emperors – the result of China’s controversial one-child policy – have had it pretty bloody good when you consider their parents’ and grandparents’ generations faced the horrors of the Great Famine, the Cultural Revolution and flared trousers. They may be blinged up with iPhones, Gucci handbags and Burberry scarves but one thing the girls at least still can’t get their hands on these days is a fella.

Now, it’s not quite clear why this might be, given that the one-child policy and a cultural predilection for a son and heir has led to a gender imbalance in China which could mean 40 million more men than women by 2020. Maybe the women need to try a bit harder, put some…

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